There are a multitude of ways that our loved ones connect with us after they have passed. They sprinkle the scent of their favorite perfume (or tobacco) in the room. They twiddle with the lights. They tap you on the shoulder to make sure you know—yes, that’s their song you hear playing over the shopping mall’s audio.

But sometimes you want a little more. You want to feel some sort of connection. You want a knowing they are watching over you.

While you could connect and receive Marvelous Messages™ with a medium, maybe that’s not your thing. Or maybe you are just looking for a quick nod on a blustery, rainy day.

One way to do that is by using an oracle deck. Here’s How:

First, sit quietly for a few moments. You might consider lighting a candle and/or saying a silent prayer.

Next, tap into the essence of your loved one. Think especially of their laughter, the sound of their voice, the touch of their hand, the things they loved to do. The more you can capture them within all of your senses, the better your reading will be.

If you don’t know these things about them (perhaps you’re thinking of a great-grandparent you never met), you might try instead, focusing on a photograph of them or stories you've heard. You can call them forward with the questions you ask of them.

Slowly think of a question you’d like to ask them. Some questions are better than others for this method. Avoid "yes/no" questions. You’re often better thinking in terms of:

• What can I learn from this?
  
  
• How can I further myself?
  
  
• How can I use what I know about you?

Questions such as “How did you pass?” or “Why did this happen?” will more likely bring conceptual, spiritual answers rather than truth. 

As you pull your card, think beyond the words of the card’s description and tap into the fullness of the images there. How do they connect to your loved one, their personality, and your relationship with them?

Look for deeper symbols in the card. If necessary, Google the meanings of those symbols to glean even more.

Take out your journal and let the words flow. Give yourself permission to write whatever comes to mind, no matter how ridiculous or outlandish it might seem. Just go with it. You can go back later if you want and decide what to believe or not believe. For now, just have fun with it. 

Here are some examples I did this week:

Of my cousin, who died in a car crash, I asked: “How am I to comprehend your passing which occurred so tragically and while you were yet so young?”

I pulled a card called ADVENTURE, which at first surprised me. Death an Adventure? But, of course, he would think that. It would be so him to do so. But more importantly, the first image that caught my eye was a large butterfly, an image that blazons the cover of my Transformational Healing book.

Ah, Transformation. Then I realized, it was a more literal concept that I should glean. I am to know that at that moment, he transformed and began a new adventure.

Then I saw it. The painted lines of the road. My cousin spent most of his life “on the road.” And here he was ever still on the road, and reminding me too, to keep moving forward, keep on moving on.

I asked my next question of my aunt. I hadn’t planned to ask her a question but felt nudged to do so. We didn’t always see eye-to-eye, albeit, there existed between us a chasm of some sixty-plus years and the equivalent of three generations.

So I asked: “How can I better understand our relationship? What can I learn from it?"

I pulled a card called GROUNDED, consisting of multicolored strands traversing a flowing bed of water.

Yarn! Not at all what they were meant to be, but what I saw! My aunt knit or crocheted afghans for every member of the family. Her Christmas-gifted slippers were one of her calling cards. And here lay these strands, woven together in not one loop, but two. And it hit me at that moment of just how much she and I were really alike.

Fiercely independent, strong-willed, “I will find a way to get it done.” That’s the kind of person she had been. And here, two separate bundles of cord crossed over together, indicating the path we’d once shared.

Near the end of the crossing, the strands knit together, then became a rainbow road. Together they showed how our influence carried on to others.

She had influenced who I am. In doing so, I carried on her essence to others. And as the circle of life continues, that essence carries on.

Wow. I left that reading with a greater appreciation of her and what we shared, even though, as a child, I didn’t often understand her.

Of my father who had suffered greatly through illness, I asked, “What can I learn from what you suffered so that I might be able to help others?"

I pulled a gigantic heart engulfed in flames entitled simply, PASSION. An angel draped her wings over it’s top, and a moon glowed full in the background.

The thing I could not ignore was love, and love is often tried by fire. His love had been yet he was letting me know it was still as strong as ever (if not even more). I know I could have gleaned much more, but stalled, being so touched by such a tremendous love.

Of my mother I asked: "How do I mother my adult sons without overburdening them, without holding them back?"

Her card’s reply was VISIONING, a naked goddess woman, surely a mother, holding energy and a glowing ball.

The message I “heard” was “to hold the vision of their greatness for them. Be the keeper of the light so that if they should ever feel down and out I could be the one to remind them of that vision, of how much I believe in them, and that everything will work out alright. By holding that vision for them, I might know they would find their true path and soul’s way.”

So try your hand at connecting through an oracle deck. The deck used here is the Amethyst Mahoney Divine Love Oracle. (Sorry, these decks are no longer available.) She joined with 40 magnificent healers, artists, and highly-gifted, intuitive beings to bring this deck to fruition.

There is definitely something for every oracle deck lover. One of the cards, "Read" is designed by me. You can listen to my interview about the Read card here.

I hope you enjoy connecting with Divine Love to your passed loved ones. Let me know in the comments below how it goes. And please share this “how to” with others who you feel might benefit from connecting in this way.

Card credits (in order of appearance): Spirit - Brianna Hall; Confidence - Sharon C. Bechtold; Adventure - David Rosenhaus; Grounded - Leah Ocean; Passion - Angie D. Hills; Visioning - Ilisa Millermoon; Joy Pillow - Arwen Lynch Poe. (Update, the Grounded card by Leah Ocean has been updated to a different version in the actual deck.)